Older and Wiser

 

My daughter sits confidently on my hip with one arm wrapped around my shoulder as we make our way through the maze of St. Patrick’s Day Parade participants. She peers at the crowd and back at me with one of her all-knowing expressions. Her face seems to say that she has seen this all before. I give her a gentle squeeze and a look that says, “Well, you haven’t actually, but you are wise beyond your years.”

My daughter is turning two this weekend. I have spent the last several days navigating various toy stores looking for the ideal gift and decorations for the big event. Foolishly I tried to engage my daughter in the latter, holding up countless decorations to her to see if she gravitated toward any, but there was always a shiny ball on the horizon, a swishy stuffed animal or something else that struck her fancy. At the end, I went with Tinker Bell décor because I liked the color scheme and matching balloons, but the importance of the affair isn’t lost on me.

It is, in truth, both exciting and a little sad to see your children age. On one hand, it is absolutely fascinating and invigorating to watch them transform into little individuals. On the other, the mere transformation itself can make you long for days past. It seems only weeks ago I was holding my daughter tightly against my chest in the delivery room. Her beautiful big eyes staring up at me with one of her now familiar omniscient gazes. She was born with the same self-assurance that she has today.  

But with every passing year, and indeed every passing day, there are more changes. Always the daredevil, her actions are now more calculating and exact. Her unwavering determination which was literally visible at birth remains steadfast, but the consequence of the action at hand appears to be more top of mind. Her vocabulary and eagerness to communicate have accelerated, and it is clear that her mind is learning at an elevated pace. Even her body, which was forever one big belly surrounded by slim limbs, has begun to transform into a leaner silhouette.

I imagine my daughter on her birthday wearing a new dress and with her hair pulled away from her face – just the way she likes it – surrounded by Tinker Bell balloons, and then I think of the many more changes ahead. Today she is a toddler; tomorrow a little girl. There I go again, getting a little melancholy. The truth of the matter is that this journey through time, this journey from infant to child to adult is what I signed up for from the start. It is the awesome responsibility of encouraging my daughter to be all that she already is and all that she dreams of being - and welcoming the changes. It is a gift, and I wouldn’t change even one aspect of it for anything. Happy Birthday Sweet Girl!

Embrace Your MOMentum

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A Salute to Single Moms

After my fifth trip in thirty minutes to the bathroom, it hits me. I’m sick! In fact, I’m really sick! I need to lie down immediately. I collapse into bed, drag another blanket around me, and eventually fall asleep to the faint sounds of my children playing downstairs with my husband. I close my eyes and thank God for my husband, as I couldn’t possible handle two little ones in my state.

Later when I’m on the mend, I start thinking about the last few rough days and my utter inability to do anything short of lie listlessly in bed. Out of nowhere I gasp and say to myself, “what on earth do single mothers do when they are ill?” Sure it is unpleasant to be sick, but I have the luxury of curling up in bed and asking my husband to take over, but what if it were just me? My chest tightens, and my mind shifts to my sister in law.  She has surely dealt with this issue before and my respect for her increases although, in truth, it was already high.  

I was impressed with her decision at thirty-something to take solo parenting on. I knew she would be a great mother, and her child would be beyond fortunate, but I tended to focus more on the joys of parenting rather than the challenges.  Now as I envision her sick, wrapped in one of her handmade quilts, and caring for her 22 month year old son, I have a whole new appreciation for what it really means to go it alone.  It seems downright daunting. She is, of course, a super hero of moms: handling a full time job, tackling an unbelievable commute, never missing a relative’s birthday, making and sending handmade gifts, finding time to exercise, frequently visiting family, and all the while lovingly raising a sweet little boy.  Throw the stomach flu into the midst, and even with a super hero cape, it would be tough!

And then it dawns on me, my sister in law and single mothers in general do what all mothers do; they put their children first. They put their own feelings aside even when they are feeling lousy. They suck it up and find their inner strength. They raise their children by themselves because they can and because they’re good at it. Simply put, they embrace their MOMentum. But to be clear, and with all that said, I’m still impressed. Caryn and single mothers everywhere, my hat is off to you!

Embrace Your MOMentum

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Family Vacation

Planning a family vacation is always entertaining; my mind automatically starts envisioning the journey. Of course, this type of daydreaming can lead to let downs when the actual vacation arrives. Anyone that has experienced poor weather in a tropical paradise can relate, but there is something to be said for the joy of the blueprint or the plan.

As I flip through various brochures and examine maps for our approaching escapade, I can almost see my children’s smiling faces as we make new discoveries and venture down paths previously unexplored. My imagination runs wild with image after image of untold adventure, but it keeps coming back to the same image: an image of time - Time together as a family. Time away from the rat-race. Time without the constant beeping of emails, cell phones, or other interruptions. I take a sip of my now cold coffee, and it is this picture above all else which awakens a feeling of bliss within me.

Right as I’m beginning to revel in my delight, my son clumsily crawls onto my lap and inquires about our road trip. I begin to explain our plans and as is oft the case, he drills me with 20 questions. I giggle at the familiarity and answer each one.  His eyes light up with every answer and more questions come. Now we are both fully engrossed in the visions that have pushed all other thoughts aside. I feel my excitement grow, as we discuss where we will go, what we will see, and even what we will do at our destinations. I have to admit our plans sound fabulous, and I suddenly can’t wait to pack our bags and head out!

For all the vacations that I have planned prior to being married, prior to having children, and of the many beautiful places I have been, I can’t remember ever feeling more excited about an approaching trip. And there it is again: that conspicuous reminder that life for me is better with kids.  Oh…There I go again! My husband consistently tells me that I need to stop writing so many blogs about how much I love my children, and I’m sure this is sound advice, but I just can't help myself.

The facts are the facts; planning a family vacation is fun. Spending time with my little ones is even more fun, and time together in virtually any setting is precious.

Embrace Your MOMentum

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